Run. Speak. Pray. Sit.

Sean and I are closing in on 20 years together and our marriage is stronger than ever.. today. Though if you asked me last week if we were “feeling” strong in our union I would have said, no, not particularly.

Sean and I were not set up for success. Both his parents and mine are divorced – and each of us has struggled through the loss of our own first marriages.

So we certainly are not quick to offer up marriage advice and certainly do not feel like experts. But while we were having a dinner date night last night we pushed ourselves to come up with four things that help us bring ourselves back to center in our marriage. Not an exhaustive list. Just the one we could agree on while we split an entree on a Friday night.

RUN TOGETHER – Sean and I have run a few marathons together, and enjoy training together. He wants to run a 50-miler in 2016 and so he’s been running several days each week. I love running, too – and now that a spider bite on the bottom of my foot is healed up I’m back out on the trails as often as possible. Running together gives us time to talk, connect, and dream. And since one of his love languages is quality time, this time together is key to keeping us connected.

SPEAK KIND WORDS – The power of life and death is in our tongues. I’ve really had to learn to tame mine and use my words to build him up rather than constantly reminding him how I’d rather see things done this way or that way. And since he’s more of a pictures guy than a words guy – this one pushes and helps both of us. Words of affirmation are my top love language so when he can remember to say something nice to me it fills me up like nothing else.

PRAY TOGETHER – They say couples who pray together stay together. However, I can’t actually find any reliable statistics on this issue. I can say that when Sean and keep our eyes focused on God together in prayer regularly, we are far less likely to get caught up in our little issues and irritations. He leads prayer at night. I lead in the morning. And nobody gets mad if we skip a day of prayer together, we just try to do better next time.

SIT ON THE SAME SIDE OF THE BOOTH – This works for us. You may enjoy gazing into one another’s eyes and having long conversations about your day (do people really do that?) But if you see us out on a date we’ll be on the same side of the booth. His top love language is physical touch and if we are close enough to touch during dinner, it softens his heart and makes him more likely to try to answer all my questions about life and work and raising kids.

So Honored…

CHARLOTTE  (6:14AM) – One of my all-time favorite quotes is this from C.S. Lewis, “The Weight of Glory:”

“There are no ordinary people. You have never talked to a mere mortal. Nations, cultures, arts, civilizations–these are mortal, and their life is to ours as the life of a gnat. But it is immortals whom we joke with, work with, marry, snub, and exploit–immortal horrors or everlasting splendours.”

I am reminded of this thought often – that every human interaction is an opportunity to touch the divine – to make an indelible impact on someone – and I hope I’m reminded enough that I treat people always with honor and respect.

I was reminded of this thought again this weekend.  Our dear friends Laci and Wes took care of the boys while we attended a couples workshop taught by Drs. Beverly and Thomas Rodgers. Dozens of couples in a South Charlotte hotel room, working, learning, wanting to build better marriages.

I felt so honored and blessed to be in the company of so many beautiful people willing to overcome their fears and work toward becoming what Dr. Bev calls “the Divine Us.”  We enter marriage as two separate human beings – and if we can, together, work past the “power struggle” phase EVERY marriage will face – we can then begin to heal each other’s wounds to build the kind of lasting relationship God wants for his people.

Thank you, Tom and Bev – for sharing how you moved from deep woundedness to wholeness with us so we can learn from your struggles and have the courage to face our own pain and fear.  Thank you to each of the couples in that room – for being there, for opening up, for your warmth and kindness.  I learned something from each of you.  And thank you to my dear, kind, selfless, hard-working husband.  The best is yet to come.

Rodgers Christian Counseling holds several of these “Soul Healing Love” workshops each year.  I am certain this weekend marriages were saved in that room.

My Friend Alison is Getting Married

MATTHEWS, NC (1:33AM) – My friend and former WBTV colleague Alison Toole is getting married this weekend.  And months ago, this highly organized, extremely talented photojournalist signed up our family business to take her wedding photos.

 

My Model Gorgeous Friend

 

There is no greater compliment, nor greater pressure.  Thank you my friend, for trusting us for such an important assignment.  You’re going to be the most beautiful bride!

See more photos on our new Lyon Pictures Photography Blog.

Courage

HICKORY (8:52am) – One of my youngest son’s favorite books is called “Cowardly Clyde.”  It’s a sweet Bill Peet book about a horse who has to face his greatest fears in order to save his friend’s life.

My Youngest Son's Favorite Book

On-air, over the last several months, it hasn’t always been easy to appear like everything’s okay.  Like Clyde in the book – I’d often find myself working hard to pretend like I was brave.

Because – and I’m going to be completely honest here – everything was not okay.

A television journalist’s job may seem simple to you.  After all, the critics might say, “all you have to do is read the teleprompter.”  But that’s just nonsense.

When It’s Time to Trade UP

CHARLOTTE (11:35pm) – Television news is a demanding, stressful, rewarding line of work.  Little did I know when I started in Spokane, Washington straight out of college – just how far this career would take me, how much it would teach me, and how much I would fall in love with the people who make this business so rewarding.